Bigman Blogs

As i was walking through an abandoned town trying to find some content for my YouTube channel, I came across a diary that contained the private life of a Muslim who once lived there. At first,I was hit by excitement but then was soon replaced by guilt for this was a private document I was going through. I decided to try and understand what kind of life this person once led but I was soon met with more questions than answers . Before delving into the diary in its entirety, here is a snapshot from the first 2 pages which in all honesty, left me confused, INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS LOG  05/2017 " Waking up to use the bathroom and immediately a thought or voice saying "disorganized" came up. It seems they don't want me to document their intrusive thoughts "They tried to bait me with nudity by broadcasting it while I slept in the hopes I would act upon those urges when I wake up and search it up. I decided against it by going straight to pray. "Their tactics are weak an

 As I tucked in the envelope and was getting ready to leave, I remembered I had only my fixed blade knife with me. I started doubting myself and paranoia set in. If I was going to meet them, I should be prepared and I felt unprepared. Was this the path to self destruction? I asked myself. Doubting yourself. What if I took a sip of a the whiskey in Peter's kitchen? I had to chuckle at this thought since am Muslim and don't drink but I had to acknowledge where the thought originated from. It originated from a fear that was long neglected due to a misplaced self-confidence. It was time to face my fears and test the theory of a plan I crafted 3 years ago.  Sensing all these questions and emotions on my face, Peter called out, " You know if you are going to be facing them, asking for your mentor's advice is not a big deal" "You don't even believe that yourself" I said It was true. He and I knew we couldn't involve my long time mentor Mr X as I did not

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"Firstly, the accurate understanding of  tawakkul  is not merely based on the idea of reliance, but also on the human’s recognition of being imperfect creation of God which would naturally limit their ability to overcome life’s challenges alone without God. It is a recognition that humans could still fail despite putting the best effort for life’s objective and, thus, they must rely on God’s support. For that, as humans, we should strive to strengthen our relationship with God through constant  ibadah  and not letting life’s endeavours neglect the devotional obligation to Him." https://muslim.sg/articles/tawakkul-meaning I often dreamed of having a close personal relationship with my Lord and how it would look mostly brought out into my consciousness by lecturers in mosques. After a while, I would forget about it sometimes years might pass until I was able to ask myself that question again and thoughts and ideas would race in my mind as to how it might look like. That was whe

 Below are photos I took using my Canon EOS Rebel T7. I thought of editing them and adding a bit of glamour to them but they already look glamorous themselves and refrained from editing them. I will give a brief description about each photo and take you on a little journey. Welcome! A Day in Watertown This photos were taken right outside the City Hall of Watertown and it was around 1pm when I came out for lunch from a job I was doing for a local hospital. I wanted to experiment with the camera and an incident happened. I parked my car at the back of the City Hall, a spot reserved for employees of the City and I had a little argument with a lady that worked at the building which ended in her calling the cops on me. At first, my intention was to snap a quick photo or two and get out of there but it didn't work out. I shot a couple of photos after the incident and left, giving me an opportunity to learn more about a City and their civil service. Remember, this is a city where a massiv

 It's 6:20am, the sun has risen broadcasting and enveloping everything with its magnificence. The air is warm, not humid but just at the perfect range. A deep feeling of hope resonates within you as a new day has dawned. The orange hue of the sky adds an extra layer of warmth and happiness to all that stop to gaze at it but most don't. People are in a rush to get to their sustenance not realizing the source of their sustenance is right above them. Some are excercising with the belief that it'll make them feel better which is true but the source of the calmness and peace of mind they seek is right above them. Then there's me who suddenly stopped while racing home as I had just pulled an all nighter and asked myself, 'What's the rush?' I parked my car and pulled out my camera and I shot these above clips. Enjoy! Show some love and support by subscribing to my YouTube Channel;  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeyBd1I-E8b9TYztm7Kvtkg I decided to delete the You